FINALLY: The Cowgirl Room

Hannah and me in her room when she had just turned 3. She's now 6 1/2.

I'm posting an old photo of Hannah's room before the updates and renovations. For obvious reasons (just look at those walls! Oh wait! This was taken before I tried to remove the textured wallpaper.) I don't have a lot of photos of her room. Between the wallpaper that was partially removed, or the ugly brown cardboard-like material hiding under the wallpaper that had been removed to the... mess, there wasn't a really good reason for me to go snooping around in there with a camera. Too bad, because the before and after photos would have been A-MA-ZING.

For the last year or more, I have wanted to somehow re-do or repair the damage hiding under the textured wallpaper. Warning: If any of you ever buy a house with textured wallpaper, be afraid of what's lurking underneath. Be very afraid.

To say that our budget is tight would be an understatement, and that is one of the main reasons we had not been able to get my oldest daughter's room in order. It wasn't because I didn't want to. No, this mother's heart desperately wanted to create a space where her daughter could play, read, rest and have friends over to enjoy. Over the course of the past year, Hannah has gone from wanting a princess-themed room to a cowgirl-themed room.

A few weekends ago, my mom was in town for a conference. As she was leaving town, she stopped by and we were talking. Then she grabbed some Spackle from the garage, started filling in the damaged places on the wall, and the rest is history.

Dear friends, let me show you Hannah's Cowgirl Room.

This is the view when you first open the door. My Hubby picked out the light switch, which we found at Walmart for less than $3. You can't really tell in this photo, but it's kind of a bronze finish.

This is what you see when you step inside the room. The pink color is Strawberry Float and the brown color is Hot Chocolate; both were bought at Lowe's. I found the dark chocolate valance at Target for $15.






The pale pink bedding was purchased at Home Good's at least a year ago for about $40. It's a very pale pink with tiny white polka dots.







One of the issues we had last school year was Hannah never being able to find her coat or backpack. Problem solved with this handy hook I found at Hobby Lobby which says, "Cowgirls Welcome." Our new routine this coming school year will be hanging her coat and backpack up when she gets home.





This is one of my favorite vignettes in the entire room. It's hard to see the little table, but I found that at a pre-yard sale for $10. I had already had the lamp for many years. The Cowgirl wall plaque and Rodeo Girl picture frame were found at Hobby Lobby for about $6 or $7 each.









We got this cube shelf within the last year at Target when it was on sale (they are regularly $45, I think and we got ours for around $30 if I'm remembering correctly). The canvas cubes are $6 each at Target.










This was my Hubby's dresser when he was growing up. When Hannah was born, we sanded it and painted it green to match her yellow, blue and green "Little Suzy's Zoo" themed nursery. Funny, we had to just sand it again and repaint it brown, which is what it was originally.





The brown boots were a steal at Gymboree, for about $7 or less and were bought to match a cream and white cow print dress, which she has now grown out of. I'm glad they weren't put in with all the consignment items! The little pink and brown Cowgirl box was a Hobby Lobby find and was no more than $8.





See this adorable picture of a beautiful baby on a bed of pink roses? Yep, that's the same beautiful, creative girl in the photo above. She is SO HAPPY with her Cowgirl room. And her Mommy is SO HAPPY that her girl has a place all her own to enjoy.

I would like to get a brown or rust colored barn star, but haven't found any locally and will probably get one the next time I'm in Huntington... I'm sure I'll go to Hobby Lobby, too! While it may not be perfect, it's such an improvement over what it was. But the most important thing is, my girl is happy with her room.

When my mom asked Hannah what her favorite part of her room was, she answered, "Everything."

I'm linking this post to: Anti-Procrastination Tuesdays at New Nostalgia and
Transform Tuesdays at The Pumpkin Patch.

Scared Stiff

In my previous life (read: before I had children), I worked full-time. Mostly, I liked it. By the time my oldest child was born when I was nearly 26, I had held jobs in a wide variety of places, giving me an excellent background and great resume-worthy experience.

When my oldest was born, I wrestled with whether or not to return to work. The company for which I work allowed for up to 6 months of short-term leave, but in the end, we decided we wanted me home. With a heavy heart, I submitted my resignation letter. I just hated to leave such a great company.

I stayed home with my oldest for 17 months, until our finances dictated that I must return to full-time work immediately. I can't tell you how much heavier my heart was to leave my child in daycare to go to work. I missed out on so much of her little-ness. Even after she was 2, then even when she was 3, there were mornings when she would cry to stay home with me.

How many mornings did I arrive at work with pink, tear-stained eyes?

I landed a job with a wonderful company and was there all of 4 months before I [finally] got pregnant with my youngest daughter. I had wanted to work for this company for a long time and I think they were the best people and company that I ever worked for. I adored working there. They were so wonderful to me during my high-risk pregnancy, and even though they knew I would likely not return, they loved on me and supported me the entire time. My heart sank when our pediatrician told me to resign my position, given that my baby had an NG tube down her nose for feedings and that there are no daycare facilities in my area that can take care of medically needy babies.

I left the work force with no idea when I might return. I thought about when I might go back to work, but it all depended on how well the little one was. Well, you know the answer to that! She's a fireball full of activity. No delays. Aside from her shoe lifts, no needs whatsoever.

But have you tried to find a job lately? Wowza.

I talked about trying to work from home, but most of the time, there were costs associated, if not for membership or training, then for equipment or services needed to complete the work. It looked like a daunting, impossible task.

A friend of ours recently posted a job. He owns his own biz and after we chatted about what the company needs, Hubs and I decided to try it on, walk around in it, see how it fits.

(And to my friend, Angie, I think this is the kind of thing you've been trying to tell me about for the past year. You are the wisest of us, dear friend.)

So, dear friends, one of the reasons I've not been online as much or as chatty on the blog as much is because I've been working! From home. Praise God and Please, Help Me, Jesus!

I'm just really getting started this week and besides getting acquainted with the websites/applications I'll be using, I've been learning valuable lessons. First of all, I seriously need to look up the blogs that have time management worksheets and find one/some for Work-From-Home-Moms. The thought of scheduling my evenings is a bit scary.

Second of all, if this works out, I think I may forget about going back to get my Master's degree in Education in order to pursue teaching and focus on working from home. That's a big IF. But if it works out, I would be able to be involved at the girls' school and be there as often as possible without having to take time off from a conventional job. I'm thinking of all the pro's while wondering what hurdles I may face along the way.

But for now, I'm taking it one task at a time.

After nearly 3 years of being a Stay-At-Home-Mommy, and after thinking and talking about working from home for about 2 years, I'm finally doing it.

Your prayers would be so appreciated! :-)

The Laundry Room

Help me, Jesus! This is the thought and prayer I had every time I thought about cleaning out and organizing my laundry room. It became the catch-all for dirty laundry, cleaning supplies and mate-less socks.

I cringe as I post my "before" photo:

Note the piles of stuff all over. What you can't see is, in front of the dryer, there's a large hamper full of clothes. It actually blocked the back door.

I mean, really? Wow. I can't believe I'm putting this out there. But I am.

Partly because I'm proud of what I've accomplished. Partly because I think there might be just one more person out there who has a piled up laundry room and maybe they need to be encouraged that it doesn't take all that long to clean it out.

First, I started with clearing out all the clothes. Dirties went into the washer. The clean clothes were folded and put away. Then I had my Hubby pull out the dryer and I vacuumed the vents and floor. I wiped down the washer and dryer. I organized my laundry supplies and put away cleaning supplies that weren't laundry related.

It took me only a little bit of time, actually. I was interrupted by my two-year-old several times, but it took me a total of only a couple of hours, maybe, to get my laundry room straight. And as you can see, it really needed it!

This is my "after" photo. My washer and dryer are actually running as I took this photo. All supplies, including hangers, are within arm's reach.

I am embarrassed to admit that the first day or two after my laundry room was clean, I kept bending over to pick up the laundry detergent from the floor to do a load of laundry. I had gotten so used to it being on the floor, instead of on the shelf as it should be that I instinctively bent over to get my detergent.

Also note that the hamper is gone. The floors are clean. We can actually walk out our back door. Will wonders ever cease?

I can't tell you how happy I was that our Fly Lady missions last week included cleaning the laundry room. Mine needed it so badly! And I'd already decided to work on it, so having actual Fly Lady missions to help was just icing on the cake.

I have had this antique wash board for years, always with the intent of hanging it in my laundry room. And now it finally has a home on my wall!

I also have two little signs to make me smile. One says, "Laundry Help Wanted" and the other says "When I said I do, I didn't mean Laundry."

Just a lil' laundry humor here, folks!

Because I don't know many people who just love to do laundry. If you find anyone who does, send 'em my way!


Fly Lady suggested hanging a nice picture in our laundry rooms to give us something pretty to look at. I've had this for a long time, and I'll soon change the decor in my TV room, so it wouldn't have anywhere to hang. I hated getting rid of it, but the bucket is blue and I'll be using greens, so it would be out of place.

It's actually quite perfect for my laundry room. It's fresh but winks at the past, with the weathered boards and antique bucket. I love it. And keeping with the theme of keeping only what I love or what is useful, this little baby fits the bill! Because I do love it and it blesses me and makes me smile as I do our laundry.

In the spirit of Anit-Procrastination Tuesday, I also have a few items from my Doozey list that aren't fully complete, but are in progress:

* Having a set time for email, Facebook and blogs (mostly finished, but I need to check it twice a day for church nursery updates, etc.)
* Preparing for yard sale on May 1st. My local charity is already scheduled to come pick up unsold items.
* Reorganizing laundry room - DONE!
* Reorganizing Master Bedroom

Progress is slow and steady. This isn't a sprint; it's a marathon, but thankfully, it IS getting done, one job at a time.

THIS is what I'm thinking!

I have been finding some real gems lately in the "Christian Moms Blogosphere." A lot of what I'm finding is exactly what I need right now.

This blog post, for example, really hits home. She says what I've felt, but have never adequately written.

I've been pondering some things, including praying for God to send me a real Christian "sister" kind of friend. I'm feeling lonely and all of the wonderful women I know are miles away, for the most part (if you are reading this, you are included in that group!).

I'm also considering adding a new blogroll that's dedicated to Home & Organizing.

A Month's Worth of Thoughts

On Cleaning Out and Organizing My Home

Oh, wow. I've been really busy this month. I've been doing my Fly Lady missions. I made HUGE progress in our master bedroom and Abbie's room. It's looking a lot better, but I still have a long way to go. I still say there is a black hole somewhere that spills out more stuff after I've cleaned out and given away those items. Seriously! :-) My goal is to completely declutter and clean out unused things, then paint and re-do it. I can hardly wait!

I've been trying to give myself these types of goals to keep myself motivated. The "reward" for getting a room completely uncluttered and cleared out is re-doing it. For example, in our formal living room, my reward will be new drapes (badly needed!), paint and new throw pillows for the sofa and love seat. The master bedroom needs it all: bedding, curtains, mini-blinds and paint. The TV room needs paint, curtains, new ceiling fan and, eventually, a new couch. Eventually, we need to replace the carpet in the entire house. Following Dave Ramsey's teaching, we are saving up for the couch and carpeting, rather than trying to finance the cost.

On Marriage

I've wanted to write about this for the entire month of February. But I've always hesitated because when you talk about stuff like this, you put yourself out there and I just don't want to deal with any possible drama. At the end of the day, I feel like the good of sharing what I've learned and gleaned this month outweighs the bad of a possible backlash.

Every marriage goes through seasons, ranging from times of more closeness to times of struggle. I learned that 80% of marriages that have a child with special needs end in divorce. That is a staggering statistic! I've learned why over the past 2 1/2 years and Abbie's issues are FAR from severe compared to the vast issues other children face. There's a lot of give and take and sacrifice on both a husband's and a wife's parts, and it can be easy for conflict to arise. Thankfully, we are getting to a point in Abbie's care that it's become a dance of sorts... we know when the tests for cancer screening are due, and the appointments for specialists are now down to once a year. It's gotten easier and the stress level has gone down for the most part.

There have been other issues that have caused the past 2 years to be really hard for us. I'm not going into those because they're personal and are our business to be discussed between the two of us. The month of February brought a turning point and I have to thank God for that. It's no coincidence that I was pretty much deluged with teaching, lessons, encouragement and points of view that helped me readjust my attitude, thoughts and feelings and allow forgiveness and healing.

From my church: Sermons my pastor has preached have really planted seeds in my heart. I'm thankful to have a shepherd who tells it like it is, who sheds light on the truth so that we may grow. Amen.

From Joyce Meyer: When you are hurt, you feel that someone has to pay. And you keep feeling that someone has to pay and start feeling entitled to being angry until someone pays. The truth is, Jesus died for everyone's sins. Holding on to that entitlement means you don't accept that Jesus' blood covered those sins. It's not faith. It's feeling like your pain is more than the blood. (My paraphrase, except the first sentence. It was a POWERFUL message that I still have saved on our DVR so I can go back and listen to it again.)

From Blogs: Blog posts have really given me a lot of insight. I have read and read and read this month. Some of the nuggets of wisdom I have found are....

This first link had a profound impact on me:
http://www.incourage.me/2010/02/he-wants-more-than-love.html

http://www.brookemcglothlin.com/2010/01/year-of-prayer-husbands_12.html

http://todayshousewife.blogspot.com/2010/02/praying-from-head-to-toe.html

http://momsinneedofmercy.blogspot.com/2010/02/what-to-do-when-you-feel-like-hes-just.html

http://momsinneedofmercy.blogspot.com/2010/01/even-though-your-husbands-big-boy-he.html

http://www.incourage.me/2010/02/fanning-the-flames-of-friendship.html

Maybe marriage and relationships were a hot topic because Valentine's Day is in February and people have been doing a lot of soul searching on the topics. Or maybe there are a lot of us out here who are wanting to cultivate marriages that are truly loving, Christian marriages that are marked with the fruits they should be. If people aren't learning and growing and actually acting like Christians in their marriages, what's the point, right? Because we're no better than "the world" when we don't step up to the plate and actually practice what we preach; we're worse if we say one thing and live another. It's called hypocrisy. I'm not trying to say that there isn't grace when we make mistakes because I know that no one is perfect. What I'm saying is, once we have made mistakes, we need to learn from them, grow and move on.

And people, I have to confess that I have been stuck in a a rut and mired in mud and muck for two years. Yep. Two. Long. Years.

I have held on to hurt and anger and this entitlement to being as hurt and angry as I wanted to be because I was wounded. Thankfully, God has debried the wounds of my heart and spirit.

As simple as it sounds, one of the major things that has helped bring healing to my heart has been praying for my husband. Do you know how embarrassed I am to write that? Do you know how much I hate to confess that for most of our marriage, I have not prayed for my husband like I should? Yeah, I'd pray for him here or there, but not consistently. But by starting out as simply as just thanking God for my husband began a work in my heart. Then I pray that he has a good day at work. I mean, how simple is that? But, friends, I wasn't an armor bearer for my husband, the head of my household. Now I know to do better. Now I know how important it is to pray for my partner and the father of my daughters.

Ever notice how much love grows in your heart when you are praying for a person?

It's easy to pray for your children or for those who haven't significantly hurt you. The Bible says even heathens will be good to those who are good to them. But praying for those who have wounded you / your enemies... that is what we are called to do.

What happens, really, is that you change. My Valentine's Month lesson has been that I should ask God to change my heart. All this time, I've asked Him to change the hearts of others around me. What I've decided to do now is pray for them, yes, but not to be changed in the ways I think they should be changed. Rather, bless them and change my heart towards them.

They say that charity starts at home. Well, a LOT of things start at home. Like, growing. Healing. Loving more and nagging less. And prayer.

A couple of links to tide you over....

Just sharing a couple of links to tide you over until I have time to write more.

http://orgjunkie.com/2010/02/seven-habits-of-highly-successful-homemakers.html

http://momsinneedofmercy.blogspot.com/2010/02/seven-more-habits-of-highly-successful.html

FLYlady is kicking my butt.

Have you ever heard of FLYlady? If not, cruise on over to her website, www.flylady.net . It's worth a peek.

She may very well be my saving grace when it comes to finally getting my house clutter free.

I'll probably still need the services of my friend at www.sortmyspace.com for organizational purposes . She is AWWWWESOME. You should give her site a peek, too.

But first, I need to get rid of stuff. And as I have said here time and time again, there is a black hole is a closet or wall somewhere in my house. No matter how much I clean out, there is yet--still--MORE to clean out. Ugh. It's exhausting.

But FlyLady is helping me when my friend a Sort My Space isn't here. FlyLady is free and although the services offered by SMS are invaluable, I haven't been working since the end of October, so that means no "Mommy Mad Money" is available for those kinds of projects.

FlyLady is structured so that a person following the "program," if you could call it that, takes on one room a week, focusing on de-cluttering and deep cleaning that room, while also cleaning and keeping tidy the other rooms in the house.

Of all the great things I have read on the FlyLady website, there is one thing that has spoken to me more than anything else:

Housework, even done imperfectly, blesses your family and your home.

I am a textbook "SHE" (Sidetracked Home Executive). I have perfectionist tendencies, and when there is SO much to do, as there is here, I often shut down and procrastinate. If I can't get the entire job done, and done perfectly, I don't want to do it. What I am learning from FlyLady--and what Rita at SMS tried to teach me as well--is to take these projects one thing at a time. If I take one baby step, then another and another, after a while, those baby steps add up and, Viola! A room is cleaned out, de-cluttered and organized.

My oldest daughter's room is pretty much finished with this process. I completely cleaned my kitchen, literally from ceiling to floor and everywhere and everything in between. But the Master Bedroom is the worst. Oh, mercy, if I can get that room finished, I'm well on my way to FLYing.

In the meantime, I'm still overwhelmed by all the STUFF. I'm very much looking forward to a consignment sale the first weekend in March. I've decided that whatever doesn't sell HAS to be donated to charity after this sell and am determined to not let it back in the house.

Because I want to get so much accomplished this year, I really need to get some things done inside so I can focus on my pet projects for this Spring and Summer: plant and raise a garden, paint the exterior of the house, paint the interior of the house, remodel the half bathroom.

On my way to being a FLYbaby... come join me!

P.S.: I've found a few gems among blogs out there and have added them to my blogroll. To your right, please see Annie Blogs, Chickens in the Road, and Little Cabin in the Woods.

Still Hard at Work

The silent blog is attributed to me being still hard at work. I have goals! I'm focused on meeting those goals, and mix in "Clean House" on the Style Network, and I'm ready to go. :-)

After the yard sale a couple of weeks ago, I decided that the stuff wasn't coming back in the house and could only stay in the garage for a few weeks. So, a charity truck came to pick up some. Then I dropped off another load. And, wouldn't you know, I bet I have enough for at least another drop-off, perhaps two. (Man, is this ever a sad reflection of how much stuff has been in my house, crammed into closets and bins!)

My goals for the house are:

1. Completely clean out Hannah's room.
2. Paint and update Hannah's room (if you are friends with me on Facebook, you've read my drama. lol). She wants a princess theme. I'm trying to steer her away from Disney Princesses, but am losing that battle, so I'm trying to use lots of non-themed stuff for bedding, etc.
3. Completely clean out Abbie's room.
4. Update Abbie's room. This probably won't happen until we move her to a "big girl bed" in the fall or winter. The frontrunner for the theme is "Nursery Rhyme" because I'm (again) trying to stay away from commercial themes. Seeing Dora the Explorer in Hannah's room the past few years hasn't been so much fun.
5. Be able to park in the garage again. Seriously. And this is so, so sad. BUT! I've made LOTS of progress!
6. Paint the fence.
7. Paint the exterior of the house.
8. Have carpets cleaned.

I wrote an email to Hubs last week that went something along these lines: "In a perfect world, when it was time for Abbie's birthday party, the house and fence would be painted. Hannah's room would be updated. The house would be perfect. Balloons would be tied to the fence posts. We would have had enough money to buy the swing set for the girls and all the kids would be playing on it. People would be having fun."

He said I sounded like a Walgreen's commercial.

While I know I can't ever reach perfection, I am striving towards excellence.

"Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." ~ Philippians 4:8

Having an organized, neat, freshly painted home is lovely, admirable, noble, right, and excellent. So I'll keep thinking about those things and work towards having them done.

I Heart Mrs. Meyers Clean Day Products!

My box of Mrs. Meyers' Clean Day products arrived yesterday evening. I felt like a kid at Christmas when I got home from church and found it waiting for me, and I anxiously opened the container.

I have to say that I chose their Lemon Verbena scent because I'm not into Basil. Lavender is ok, so I might try that scent next time... sometimes, it's overpowering. Geranuim? No, thanks. Baby Blossom is a possibility, as well. They have scent free products, too. I guess the smart thing would have been to order products in scents I think I'd like!

I used the bathroom products this morning: shower spray, cleaning wipes and the toilet cleaner. I like the shower spray. I LOVE the cleaning wipes! LOVE THEM. Why? They are thicker than Clorox wipes. They are biodegradeable. They smell lovely. The toilet cleaner was so-so. I think I feel this way because of marketing, to be honest. I've previously used the Clorox with bleach cleaner that is VERY thick and this toilet cleaner isn't very thick at all. It cleaned the toilet, so no complaints. I think I just need to be de-programmed from all the TV marketing! :-)

I've yet to use the window cleaner and the Sweet Pea kitchen cleaners. The Sweet Pea stuff smells just like garden. It's formulated to smell like that... like fresh picked sweet peas. Hubs really liked it. Me, not so much. He also said he thought the Lemon Verbena smelled like rest-stops. I don't agree, but that's his take.

For more cool cleaning info, visit Mrs. Meyer's sister company, Caldera, for some neat laundry tips:

http://www.caldrea.com/CaldreaInstitute.aspx?CategoryName=Professional%20Laundry%20Secrets

It's all intermingled.

This week, I've been trying to finish cleaning out the garage once and for all. We had a yard sale today and will have another on Friday. Tomorrow, we'll be in Lexington at Shriner's Hospital for an annual check-up.

To keep me inspired, I've been watching "Clean House" on the Style Network.

It's kind of weird to hear the hosts saying to the family what I keep saying to myself. "It's not the stuff that's important; it's the memories."

I have to admit that I have been pretty awful about associating memories or traditions to stuff. So-and-so gave me/my kids this. That is from my grandma's house.

And you know, I think that kind of thinking holds a lot of people back. Listen, the people who love you most should want the best for you. And the best is not holding on to stuff you don't use. It's not the things that matter; it's the people, and the most important people want you to be able to enjoy your home and, you know, be able to actually park in your garage. (Ahem)

So, while I'm not blogging, I'm busy trying to make a better life. But I promise photos of the bathroom and maybe even our progress in the garage!

For more inspiration, check out these awesome blog posts:

http://unfamiliarpaths.blogspot.com/2009/06/dealing-with-change.html

http://notinkansas.wordpress.com/2009/05/03/thoughts-about-our-best-year-yet/

Almost Finished!

A year ago this month we began our bathroom renovation.

A. Year. Ago.

Though my Hubby would argue that it was really the first week or two of July. When looking at 52 weeks ago, or 12 months ago, does a week or two really matter?

To be fair, I should explain that when we started the project, we had no idea what we'd have to end up doing. Like replacing the floor. Then, while I was taking down textured wallpaper, we discovered that we'd have to replace the walls, as well. So, to say that we've had to do a lot would be an understatement. When we sell our house, we'll be able to happily chirp, "The bathroom is really a new build! Everything in there has been replaced, even the walls and floor." What a selling point. lol.

Last night, Hubs hung the mirror. Still to be finished are:

1. Installing a light fixture over the mirror.
2. Hanging the photo over the towel bar. Yes, I'm prissy like that. I want something to look at in there. :-P
3. Installing the toilet paper holder.
4. Installing a small towel holder by the light switch.

When those are complete, I'll post photos. And hold a ribbon cutting ceremony, complete with refreshments. :-)

Busy IRL (In Real Life)

I remember the early days of chatting when people talked about their "real" lives, and we referred to it as IRL. Do people do that anymore? I haven't chatted in forever.

Anyway, Angie over at Not in Kansas has been posting some good stuff. I was particularly struck by something she wrote in this post (it's a short post, so worth the few minutes it takes to read):

"It’s like this (as an example): If I want to be a person who has clean baseboards, I have to come to a DEEP realization that they’re not going to magically get (or stay) clean! SOMEONE has to clean them, and have a plan for WHEN and HOW they’re going to be cleaned."

In the comments section, I told her that we must be living parallel lives, because I'm in the same boat.

Last week, I began my Spring Cleaning. Not an easy feat with two little "helpers" running around, but slowly but surely, I'm getting there. Last week, I focused on the kitchen. I washed walls and cabinets. I cleaned out old medicine that had expired. I still have a few little projects, one being cleaning out the fridge, that didn't get finished because I was out of commission thanks to a mild migraine.

I also have half of the TV/Play room's walls wiped down, but that room needs some intense, deep cleaning, as it's where we spend the majority of our time. Toys need to be gone through and purged. Everything needs to be dusted and I need another package of Magic Eraser to get some scuffs and crayon markings off the walls.

Last night, I watched "Clean House" on the Style Network to inspire me. Nothing gets me inspired to clean and purge like that show! Wowza!

**********

Apart from the cleaning, other things have been keeping us busy. Abbie had her yearly check-ups in Cincinnati a couple of weeks ago. Everything is great! Praise God! I tell you, I'm just so thankful what He has done in her life. When I think of what might have been and what is, it's just overwhelming.

Also, my oldest "baby" graduated from preschool this week. Having helped in the planning, setting up and tearing down of the reception, I am pretty much worn out. I also have a pretty good idea of how it will be when she's in school and how few parents want to help with stuff. While I realize that everyone is busy and short on money, if we all did a little bit, the burden wouldn't fall on a few. A mom can hope, can't she?

So, here's to cleaning and purging! And a wonderful summer before the official First Day of School! I hope everyone is finding something to enjoy.

As soon as I can, I'll write more... 'till then, enjoy an iced tea or lemonade!

Putting It into God's Hands

I scour the Sunday newspaper. Mostly for coupons, but I always check the classified ads. I've always looked at the classifieds, even when I'm happy with my current job because you never know when your dream job will be listed.

Last week, I found something very close to what I would call my dream job.

We have talked about it at length, what it means for our family and how things would change should I be offered the job.

It's not that I don't want to stay home with the girls. My preference is to stay home until Abbie is at least 3, preferrably 4. But I sit here and look at our situation and realize that I need to generate more money than my part-time retail stint is providing, should we want to realize our goals for our family sooner rather than later.

I was chatting with one of my oldest, dearest and best friends a couple of weeks ago and we were talking about how we use coupons and what-not to save money. She, a doctor and married to a doctor, told me that people look at her as if she has two heads when she talks of saving money. People say to her all the time, "I don't understand why you don't get _____. You guys can afford it."

Similarly, people have said to us, "You all have insurance. I don't see how or why you would have issues with your finances."

Well, yeah, we have health insurance. Being the daughter of a Type 1 diabetic, insurance was always a necessity in my view of What One Needs For Life.

My friend, Dr. K., and I were talking about how easily and quickly a family can get into debt with medical bills. She flat out said, "I wouldn't be surprised at all if you all had over $100,000 in medical bills."

I could've hugged her neck, right then and there, if she wasn't in Texas.

She gets it. Most people don't. While we do have health insurance, we still have to pay for it. We have to pay for deductibles and the expenses our plan doesn't cover. When Abbie was born, Hubby had a different job that provided different benefits. If I remember correctly, hospitalization was covered 80%.

Considering Abbie's NICU bill alone was over $130,000, our portion to pay would be over $25,000. Not to mention the cost of her birth (c-section), her omphalocele surgery (not covered in the NICU bill), and her tongue reduction surgery. That's just the first 5 months of life and doesn't include all the follow-up appointments, quarterly ultrasounds and blood work every 6 weeks. It adds up very quickly!

Then, add to the mix that for 4 years, we were involved in a lawsuit (read: attorney fees) and we had another house we were trying to sell (yes, that's two mortgages!), you can perhaps have a better understanding of what life has been like for the past 4 years.

The truth is, I hate our house. It's not big enough, for one thing. Then there's the aforementioned legal issues. It's just not the place I want us to call Home. About a month or so ago, I told my husband that I am heart-hungry for a new home that is all ours, something we chose and made our own.

Our financial goals for our family are:

1. Get out of debt
2. Update the house so it is more appealing to buyers. This includes a sorely needed kitchen update, carpet and new fixtures throughout. Plus paint and carpet. Look, this house needs a LOT of TLC.
3. Put ourselves into a situation where we can sell this house and find a new one

Renovating a house requires money. Improving our financial situation requires better budgeting, saving money and paying off debt, which means, in some ways, making more money.

And still, knowing all this, I so strongly feel that my place is really home with our girls. I love being able to pick up my oldest daughter, or giving out treats at her school for Halloween dress-up, or helping with the Valentine's Day party. That's the golden ticket. Those are the golden nuggets and diamonds of motherhood.

I keep telling myself that I only have so long with my girls, then they'll be grown. Then I look around me and see thousands of people losing their jobs and looking for work. People aren't job-hopping as they did in the 90's. It's different now and I'm not sure when a job like this will become available again and that is the ONLY reason I am considering this one.

Rather than looking around me, be it at the house I loathe or the economy, I am trying to keep looking up, to my Source and Provider, knowing that He knows what my daughters, my family and I need most.

House Work

The Pioneer Woman has a list of her 5 least favorite home-related chores on the right side bar of this page.

Mine are:

1. Putting away laundry. Washing, drying and folding are no problem. I hate putting it away and am glad that I'm not the only one, as PW hates this, too.

2. Unloading the dishwasher. I like loading it, especially because I like the way I load it, with all the spoons together, the forks together, etc., because not everybody loads a dishwasher that way. Again, PW has this on her list. Are we long-lost sisters?

3. Scrubbing the kitchen and bathroom floors. I don't mind using swiffers or even wet swiffers, but I hate getting down on my hands and knees to scrub the floors, especially in the kitchen where some of the grout has chipped out and is funky.

4. Cleaning out the refrigerator. I used to actually like this, but in recent years, it's fallen off the list of stuff I like to do.

5. Scrubbing my base boards. It just takes so long and it's so tedious. It sorely needs to be done here, but I have mountains of laundry to finish first.

But! There are things I like doing. They are:

1. Cleaning the bathroom. I hate a dirty bathroom. I hate crud in the sink, I hate dirty tubs and I can't stand toilets that need a good scrubbing. When I was pregnant with my oldest, I hired Merry Maids once simply because I needed help with the tub. Since I love taking long, hot, relaxing baths, I like the enviornment to be clean and sparkly.

2. Dusting and vacuuming, although if you came to my house right now, you would totally not believe me.

3. Cleaning the kitchen. There's just something about finishing cleaning the kitchen that makes me feel like I've really accomplished something.

4. Cleaning light fixtures. I like taking them down, soaking them in hot water and putting them back up. They sparkle more. (Geez, is this a theme today or what?)

5. Cleaning out stuff in general. I had hired a professional organizer this fall, but we didn't get finished due to a long list of reasons. But, cleaning out things I haven't used in forever and either selling them or donating them to charity feels so good! I'm hoping to continue working on cleaning out and purging once the weather warms up again.

That said, my house looks like a tornado has gone crazy inside. Toys and clothes from Christmas have yet to be put away, primarily because there is no place to put them. This house is entirely way too small for our family. I have mountains of laundry to wash. The Christmas tree and decorations need to be taken down and put away. And all of these things are making me feel terribly overwhelmed.

Snow, before Thanksgiving?

That is the forecast. For tomorrow. Thanksgiving is just under two weeks away, and it just seems odd to me to have snow before Turkey Day, though I know that in many places, this is completely normal.

I have this notion that the Christmas holiday season shouldn't be official until the day after Thanksgiving. Despite my notion, we've been playing Christmas songs/videos at work since November 1.

Still coughing like crazy and I didn't accomplish 1 thing today, though I sorely needed to because this week is going to be extremely busy. I'm going to have people here twice, maybe three times, by Thursday, so I've got a lot to get done.

I've been watching the Food Network a lot today, and a part of me would love to cook Thanksgiving dinner myself this year. It's a lot of work, but I enjoy it, even if it gets crazy, like me cutting my thumb pretty badly or the turkey and its juices being so much and so heavy that the rack in my oven bowes and sags. I don't really cook like that often, but I really enjoy it.

I have hopes and goals, culinarily speaking, to learn how to make these things homemade/from scratch:

• Bread
• Chicken and Dumplings
• Fudge
• Pumpkin Rolls
• Spaghetti Sauce
• Dinner rolls
• My mom's potato salad
• My grandma's cole slaw
• My mom's gravy

Some of these things will require me to spend some time in the kitchen with my family, which I love and already do. Most of the time, I help or just keep company and they do the cooking. For me to really learn how to do something, I have to do it myself with them watching and supervising. Usually, there isn't enough time for that.

Anyone out there have a dish (or few) that you'd like to know how to make?

Random Wish Lists

Some things are on the horizon, but I can't talk about them yet. Mostly, a lot of maybe's and hope so's. Lots of prayers have been said and now there's nothing we can do but wait. In the meantime, I've been thinking of things I'd like or things I'd like to do, or changes that I'd like to make around our home. It feels like things have been On Hold for such a long time, especially with this house, that I'm ready and raring to go to make some long- and much-needed changes.

These are some of the things I've been thinking about...


Things I'd Like to Have for our Home

1. Deep Freezer. In addition to having zero storage space in our teeny weeny kitchen, we don't have a lot of freezer space, either. I'd like to buy meat in bulk, but currently have no where to put it.

2. A vegetable garden (am hoping/planning for next year). I think there's nothing like fresh veggies.

3. A pressure washer. Hubby borrowed his dad's and it's a little addictive. You start finding all the things that need a good scrub.

4. A large capacity washer and dryer. I have 2 kids. Need I say more?



Things I'd Like to Do/Finish/Learn How to Do

1. Finish the Garage and start/finish the house (which will be done as soon as I can afford to bring the organizer back).

2. Can veggies. This is something my mom and grandmother are doing in earnest this summer and I'd love to know how to do this.

3. Take a photography class. I've wanted to do this since high school, but my schedule never allowed it. Then, the class at my college was always full. I'd have to call now to try to get in for the spring semester.

4. Clean out toys. Hannah has duplicates of many toys and I'm planning this for mid-September, when my parents can take her. It's an impossible chore to do with her around, as she retrieves things from the toss/donate pile.



Projects that need finished or started and finished around our home

1. The Bathroom. It started almost 2 months ago, and still needs to be finished. I'm tired of plastic sheets surrounding the tub. I want a pretty bathroom, and I've never had one in the 8 years we've been married.

2. Carpet. The house desperately needs new carpet throughout. It's about 20 years old, light in color (not good with kids), and is just plain old.

3. Paint. Inside and out, our house needs to be painted. I think I know the perfect color for inside, thanks to our neighbor's recommendation. I already know what I want to use for outside. I doubt that the outside will be painted before winter. I'd love to have the house painted before the fall/winter, but I'm not sure if that can be done yet. We'll see.

4. Landscaping. We have an overgrown tree that needs to be cut back, pronto. (Estimates to have it cut back are around $1000. Anyone know someone who will do it for cheaper than that?) There are bushes and shrubs that need a good hair cut, too.


Things I'd like to do just for me

1. Join Weight Watchers. I'm tired of the intertube around my midsection. I'm tired of not being able to wear any of my clothes and I've held off buying bigger sizes because I don't want to get comfortable at this weight. It's not just the number on the scale, it's how I feel, overall. And my cholesterol.

2. Join a yoga and a pilates class. Again, I hate to pay money for (weight loss/exercise/house organization), but it's a challenge to try to exercise with a video with the kiddos around. The little one's nap schedule is erratic (I think she's trying to change from 2 naps a day to 1). I need the accountability.

3. Take a weekend vacation. Sounds crazy, I know, but I'd really like to get away from it all, all by myself. Yes, I'd like to go away with my husband, too, but I'm really feeling the need for some alone time. But I'd love to go to Lewisburg and stay in a bed & breakfast, and just chill out for a couple of days.

Anyone else out there been thinking, hoping and dreaming of anything in particular?

And so I wait

The Garage Project is on hold for now. My husband wanted to go ahead and install our new bath tub this past weekend, and I really didn't want two projects going on at the same time. Too much muss and fuss (ok, too much mess), so I've suspended the Garage Project until late July.

It kind of sucks because I had a lot of momentum and I'm wondering if I'll get that back up when I resume to clean out. And, if the garage has to wait, so does the rest of the house because I can't clean out outgrown clothes of Hannah and store them for Abbie without an organized, cleaned out garage. Yes, there are other things I need to do, but did I mention our babysitter is on vacation for the next couple of weeks, then has a family reunion and thereby won't be available again until about August 1st?

Anyway, I'm feeling really deflated. And defeated.

Still Working On It

I'm still working on the garage. Yes, it was/is that bad. Rather, it was that bad, and is getting better. Hubby went through some of his stuff over the weekend, and it's a great feeling to have less stuff. Unused, unwanted stuff... we often keep that kind of stuff in our homes, cars and even in our hearts. I've been thinking of some things, but don't have sufficient time to share.

We are leaving on Tuesday for a few days, and then I'm hoping to wrap up things in the garage next week. I'm not sure which room in the house I'm going to tackle first. We'll see.

I'm hoping to having photos posted of the fruits of my labor by around July 4th.

* * * * * * * * * *
Special shout out to Mo over at "How Far Can Happy Go?" over in my links/blogs section. You guys should really check her out. Please do, ok? Leave a comment, even. And, Mo, I really wish I lived nearby so you could peel my skin and I could clean for you. lol. Ok, maybe I wouldn't let you peel my skin (though I know how much you love it). But I so wish I was there to lend a helping hand. Take care, dear friend.

What I've Been Up To Lately

So, some of you are wondering about the state of The Burn, and I can report that it is healing, ever so slowly. To you "skin pickers," (shiver) I can tell you that there hasn't been a great deal of peeling, but rather, crusting (sorry, TMI, I know). I've been really concerned about all this and am trying to get in to see a dermatologist before the beginning of next year (yes, literally. If they are good, they are booked solid unless you're an established patient).

In the meantime, I have been focusing a lot of attention on a project which is going to be so worth it when it's over. I have hired a professional organizer to help me clean out the garage. My plan is to start with the garage and then move to the house. This will probably be a summer-long project, I hate to say, but my hope is that when this is finished, life will be better.

Heather over at Dooce.com wrote a really great post, part of which I'm going to include here because she says what I've been feeling better than I could:

I want to be a better wife, a more conscious and present mother, a more loyal friend, and a better listener. I'd like to handle my anxiety better. I also want to be more organized because I'm tired and fed up with not being able to find anything. Many times that anything is my head.

Some of you who know me know that I've never been organized or the best at keeping things straight, but there was a time that I could actually find what I was looking for because 1. I could remember and 2. Things weren't as out of control as they have been here for the past who knows how long.

Part of why the house is the chaotic mess it is, is we moved from a house with a full-size basement to a house without a basement at all. There isn't a lot of storage and the kitchen here is microscopically tiny, with no room to store a full set of pots and pans and a few baking sheets. I learned that having a full-size basement is potentially dangerous, as it offers ample room to throw old, outdated, unwanted stuff because you just pitch it down there and never realize the enormous pile that has surmounted in the lower level of the house. I had wanted to purge most of the basement collection before we moved, but that is a long story which I cannot tell for reasons I cannot tell, so let's just skip over that.

Last summer, I was no good around the house. I had started to experience symptoms of pre-eclampsia in late June and/or early July, so all I was supposed to do was come home after work and lay on my left side. While I spent the summer as Shamu beached on the couch, the mess in the house got worse. My husband kept things going, but things have accumulated for so long, it just never ends.

When we brought Abbie home from Cincinnati, our energy was entirely focused on her care and feedings (you have no idea how long NG tube feedings can take!) and the care and feeding of Hannah as well. Then, there was surgery and recovery.... let's just put it this way: since we got home in September, I didn't do much in the way of deep cleaning our home. I took care of my kids and that was pretty much it.

Sometime in the new year (I honestly cannot remember when), I told my therapist that I needed to do something about my house, that the stuff we've amassed is just closing in on me and that I physically felt crowded. I hate that feeling and have been trying, in meager attempts, to do what needs doing and purge all the things we no longer use or want. Hence, the yard sale in early May.

Please know that our house is nothing like what was depicted on Oprah when she did a show about hoarding. No where close. But, I don't want to even lean in that direction, so I want to get the matter of our clutter under control ASAP.

It's easy for me to get off task, and loving on my babies is always much more fun than cleaning. Then one day a few weeks ago, I decided enough is enough. I saw an ad in the newspaper and called the lady to come over for an estimate. She and I have been working to clear out the garage, which is already inspiring me to forge ahead in our home.

Can we really afford paying someone to come to our home to keep my nose to the grindstone so that our garage is finally a place where we can park our car and find lawn equipment? No, not really. It is a sacrifice to do it. But I counter: Can we really afford not to do this? My answer is emphatically, no, we cannot afford to not do this, because as Heather stated above, I want better for my kids, for my home and for myself.

In making my case for this to my husband, I said:

I want better for our kids. I want them to be able to have their friends over whenever, without having to have a huge cleaning spree right before. I want to be able to open our door without cringing when someone knocks on our door. I want to be able to invite someone in when they stop by unannounced and be really ok with the way the house looks. I want to be able to find the things I need and want to find. I want to know where things are. I want peace, calm, order and structure for our home. I want better for all of us.

So, dear friends, the reason my blog has been neglected is because I'm finally taking care of other things that have been neglected for far too long. While I love communicating with you and while I love writing about life, living life and providing a better life for myself and my kids is what's really important. I know you understand. I'll be back soon. But, as with the sunburn, without photos. ;-)

Our Home

There are a LOT of misconceptions out there about West Virginia, a lot of which have been highlighted during the primary elections here. Frankly, I have been tired of the stereotypes out there for a Very. Long. Time.

I would hope that the reason people see West Virginians the way they do is because they are ignorant. They simply do not know what life is like here in West Virginia and they certainly don't know what the people here are like.

John Denver got it. That's why the first words of his song start, "Almost Heaven. West Virginia..."

Because of our mountains, we have rivers. The oldest river in the Western Hemisphere, the New River (quite appropriately named, don't you think) ends in West Virginia. We have the Gauley River, which confluences with the New River in a magnificent cascade to form the Kanawha River, which in turn flows through the center of the State, and directly through the capital city of Charleston, the largest city in West Virginia. These rivers in addition to the Cheat, Blackwater, Tygart, Monongahela, Ohio andcountless others offer tremendous recreational opportunities.

The tallest building in Charleston is 25 floors tall,which, if you think about it, is a plus; how could you possibly build a skyscraper more beautiful than a mountain?

The capital city stretches throughout the long river valley encompassing both hill and dale. The Charleston airport, the largest in the State, sits on top of a mountain. The crime rate in Charleston, including the entire population of the Kanawha Valley (around 200,000), reflects that of the entire State, the lowest in America. No more than a handful of murders are committed each year.

Charleston has no subway systems, but, truth be known, you can get from one end of town to the other, even in rush hour traffic, in less than ten minutes. There are three major interstate systems going through Charleston, the smallest city in America to make such a claim.
The entire State has six different interstate systems, meaning, from Charleston, you can reach Cleveland, Columbus, Cincinnati, Pittsburgh, Louisville or Charlotte in four hours or less....

Ah, but once you leave the interstates, the drive becomes a thing of wonder. Two lane roads, winding up and down the mountains, offer amazing views and historic places, small towns, poor in wealth but rich in history. West Virginia is the birthplace of Mother's Day, in Grafton; and Father'sDay, in Fairmont.


We have the oldest covered bridge still in use. We have walnut festivals, strawberry festivals, apple festivals, pumpkin festivals and buckwheat festivals; arts and crafts fairs, sternwheel regattas and ramp dinners.

We have Bridge Day on the New River Gorge Bridge, over 800 feet above the New River, the only standing structure in the United States that, one day a year, allows parachuting and bungee jumping.

We have college basketball, and minor league baseball and hockey, and, just like all of America, Friday night high school football.

We have white water rafting, and skiing, and hiking, and caves, and waterfalls, and camping in every direction. We have Sundays where a leisurely drive in the car can take eight hours, and only cover 100 miles.

We have bed and breakfasts, and resorts, and golf courses, and museums, and the Greenbrier Hotel. West Virginia has more natural beauty and wonder than any person could ever imagine.

We have all of this, and yet our greatest asset is our people. West Virginians are good people. We care about each other. We talk to our neighbors over the backyard fence. We grow tomatoes for the entire neighborhood. We turn around in each other's driveways, and yell, "howdy" when we do. We sit on the porch on warm summer evenings, listening to crickets, and watching kids catch fireflies.

We loan a hammer, or a cup of sugar. We don't take two-hour lunches, but we do spend a few minutes each day with a cup of coffee, shooting the breeze.

We rarely get in a hurry. We have relatives just down the street. We don't just loan someone a socket wrench, we help them fix their car. We share recipes, and gardening tips, and our last cup of coffee. We baby-sit each other's kids, we housesit each other's dogs while we're on vacation, and we loan each other our cars if we have to get to the drugstore. We ask each other if we need anything as we're going to the market.

We celebrate each others accomplishments, and we cry over each other's disappointments.

We are a friendly folk. We are West Virginians. Mountaineers are always free! Free to take the time to enjoy life, and hold each moment in our hearts, forever.

If you are proud to be a West Virginian, then pass this on.