A Merry Christmas

Only 30 minutes are left to Christmas Day 2009.

Hubby and my oldest are already asleep. The little one had fallen asleep but is awake now. I turned the news down so I could hear her chatter.

No, my first family, grandmothers, aunts, uncles and cousins still do not have power.

No, I didn't get to travel to where I grew up to spend Christmas Eve and Morning.

But my girls are healthy and happy. They woke up and had a wonderful day. Did they notice that the average price of their gifts was lower this year than last? Nope. Did they notice anything other than the grand joy of the day? It didn't seem that they knew anything but giddy happiness today.

And my heart is full and thankful.

We read the story of the birth of Jesus from the book of Luke. We sang Happy Birthday to Jesus. My oldest proclaimed this "the best Christmas ever!"

Boy, was my heart full and thankful!

I got to speak to my parents and one grandmother, but not for long. But the conversation was long enough to learn that everyone was ok. Everyone is anxious for the electricity to be restored (at this point, about 7 days and counting). We have decided that once it's back on and everyone can get back to normal--and get to a grocery store--we WILL celebrate Christmas as a family. Even if it's the middle of January.

I told my Mom that if we are looking for a silver lining in that--and trust me, after nearly a week like this, we have to--it would be that by celebrating on a different day, our schedules should be more relaxed. Hopefully, we won't have to rush to be somewhere else by a certain time. Hopefully, we can slow down, enjoy each other and really be together, thankful for a baby that was born to save us. That's the whole point of Christmas.

This Christmas wasn't the picture perfect scene depicted in countless movies and songs. But it was perfect in that my little family was together and my girls were happy.

Not Wanting to Miss Christmas

All sorts of thoughts are swirling in my head today.

"I wonder if my parents have electricity yet."

"I wonder if my grandma, the one who lives alone, is ok. I wish I could get in touch with her."

"I wish I could get all the cookies baked and delivered, but between cleaning my kitchen (it needed it! Being sick has put me way behind on everything) and two little people needing an endless list of everything and all my attention, I doubt that will happen."

This is turning out to be a tougher Christmas season that I had anticipated. For starters, I quit my part-time retail job at the end of October so I could train for some work-from-home stuff. But then we didn't have the money to buy equipment I would need, so here I am, having paid for the training, but not training.

Another reason I quit was because I wanted to be able to enjoy Christmas this year. Last year was crazy; I worked 5 and 6 days a week. Last year, I had more money but little time. This year, I had more time but little money. We knew it would be tight but thought we'd be able to do everything we always have.

But then the furnace went out. And the tire nearly completely came off the car when a ball bearing broke. And those two hiccups in November made a big difference for December. Then Paul's bonus was less than last year's. Couple those things with us trying to be REALLY faithful and good stewarts, not spending beyond our means, thanks to Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University... and this year is nothing like years past. No Christmas cards. No gifts for our parents or grandparents. Or each other. Fewer stocking stuffers for the girls. (A year or two ago, we started getting them 3 toys each, plus a bag of clothes, puzzles and books, so the gift part has been cut back for a while.) Everything is... less.

In my head and heart, I know that Christmas isn't about the presents. I know the REAL reason we celebrate Christmas, which is to celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ.

But this year, it feels different because it's by necessity and not a choice. Though we had previously tried to cut out the excess of Christmas, this year, we are cutting back because we have to.

For a person who LOVES giving gifts, that is REALLY hard.

Our pastor has been doing a fantastic sermon series about, in part, just enjoying the season and not overextending ourselves. I'm sure there are thousands of people who are in the same shape we are, and thousands more in situations worse. I know that. And I'm grateful for what we have, because it could be much, much worse.

Last week an incredible snow storm came through. We had to reschedule Hannah's birthday party. My entire family back home is without electricity. My parents, one grandma and my brother have no phone service. It's very likely that their power won't be restored until midnight on Christmas. I'm sure they've lost a refrigerator full of groceries, as Mom just went on Thursday before the storm hit. Trees are still down everywhere, so they can't get out and we can't get in. It's very possible I won't be with my first family during Christmas.

I'm trying to not lose sight of the holiday's purpose. I'm trying to figure out what I need to get at the grocery store to somehow recreate what we'd normally do at Mom's. It's not the same, but the kids deserve more than a Mommy who's completely bummed out.

But not only for their sake, I don't want to miss Christmas. I don't want to miss an opportunity to really stop and reflect on how much God loves us that He sent His SON for us. For me. I don't want December 26th to roll around and feel like I just missed the train. That awful feeling of missing out and regret is something I don't ever want to feel when it comes to Christmas. Or really, life in general.

I hope to be able to bake some cookies and possibly listen to those great sermons again to help refocus and shift my attention on what I have, right here in this little house. I am looking forward to Family Communion tonight at church; it is always a holy experience. Maybe I need just a little more Jesus in my heart.

A Christmas Meme

1. Eggnog or Hot Chocolate? Hot Chocolate! I've never been an eggnog fan. Bleh.

2. Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree? Wraps.

3. Colored lights on tree/house or white? White. I've always preferred white for my house. But this year, I had the urge to get colored lights... but then didn't want to pay for completely redoing all the lights for the house. After Christmas sales, maybe?

4. Do you hang mistletoe? I used to. Just found what the (fake) mistletoe I used to hang... I might put it up this year.

5. When do you put your decorations up? Usually the Saturday after Thanksgiving.

6. What is your favorite holiday dish? Anything that my Mom, Grandmas or Aunts make. Most notably, mom's corn pudding (kind of like a cornbread), or the ham my grandma makes.

7. Favorite Holiday memory as a child? I have several, but one that really sticks out is the Christmas my cousin and I got dollhouses that Papaw made. He made everything himself and it even had wallpaper and carpet inside. I'm hoping to restore it for my girls, but I'm waiting until the little one gets out of her "color on the walls" phase.

8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa? I don't remember how, exactly, but I was young... Kindergarten, I think. First grade at the latest. My best friend told me I'd get coal because I said there was no Santa. I wasn't trying to be mean, but rather informative.

9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve? We have always celebrated at my Mamaw & Papaw's house on Christmas Eve. We would then celebrate at my other grandma's house and our house on Christmas Day. Now that I'm grown, married and a Mommy, we have LOTS of houses to visit... it makes Christmas busy.

10. How do you decorate your Christmas tree? Our tree is decorated with nativity themed or angel ornaments. I feel like the focus should be on Jesus. That said, I also LOVE snowmen. I have enough ornaments to decorate a (small) tree with just snowmen. Also, I get the girls a special ornament each year, so I could probably do a (small) tree with just those and any they may make in school.

11. Snow! Love it or Dread it? LOVE it.

12. Can you ice skate? I can, but not well. No twirls or anything fancy, but I can get myself around the rink.

13. Do you remember your favorite gift? From #7 above, the dollhouse my grandfather made. Now that he's gone, I adore everything he ever made or gave me.

14. What’s the most important thing about the Holidays for you? Focusing on Jesus and trying to teach my daughters the real meaning of Christmas. I also think it's important to reach out to help those who might be struggling. Family and Friends.

15. What is your favorite Holiday Dessert? Anything chocolate. There's a dessert my grandma calls "Pete's Cake" but I've also heard other people call it "Baskin Robbins Pie." Oh goodness! I also enjoy all the different Christmas cookies... seven layer bars.. this one dessert that basically sandwiches a cream cheese mixture between chocolate chip cookies. I like sweets WAY too much!

16. What is your favorite holiday tradition? Being with family. Reading the Christmas story on Christmas Eve. Our Christmas service and communion at church. Dressing my girls alike and taking their pictures. Baking cookies. Giving cookies to people.

17. What tops your tree? An angel.

18. Which do you prefer giving or receiving? I looooooooove finding the "perfect" gift for someone and wrapping it up so nicely. But in all honesty, I like getting gifts, too.

19. Candy Canes: Yuck or Yum? Not yuck, but not totally yum. When I'm in the mood, I guess.

20. Favorite Christmas Show? Charlie Brown Christmas and any of the claymation kids movies. It just doesn't feel like Christmas without them. (I like Miracle on 34th Street, too, but love the new one... especially when Santa tells the deaf girl that she is beautiful in sign language). Polar Express is becoming a fav.

21. Saddest Christmas Song? I'll Be Home for Christmas. The thought of not being home for Christmas breaks my heart. When I was a little girl, "The Little Drummer Boy" used to make me cry. I always felt bad for the drummer boy.

22. What is your favorite Christmas Song? It's hard to narrow it down to a few. I love, love, LOVE Christmas songs! My top favs are, in order:

"Religious"
O Holy Night - Particularly John Berry or Nat "King" Cole's versions. I cry nearly every time I hear it.
Mary Did You Know?
Do You Hear What I Hear?
Joy to the World
Beautiful Star of Bethlehem
O Little Town of Bethlehem

"Secular" (for lack of better words)
Sleigh Ride - Pops Orchestra Version
Carol of the Bells
The Christmas Song - Nat "King" Cole
White Christmas - Bing Crosby
The Most Wonderful Time of the Year
Holly Jolly Christmas - Burl Ives
When My Heart Finds Christmas - Harry Connick, Jr.
The Gift - Aslin Debison - Makes me cry nearly every time I hear it.

What the Recession is Teaching Me

I've thought about posting this, or something like it, for a few months now.

A lot of people are struggling this year. It's astounding to think about. At Thanksgiving, people who had jobs said their job was the thing for which they were thankful. I was reading comments from the winner of the Pioneer Woman's Kitchen Aid mixer give away. The question was, "What do you want for Christmas?" and one of the winners said, "A job for my husband." I pray that family gets what they need for Christmas.

We have been working through Dave Ramsey's "Financial Peace University" CD's. It's not easy and given that we've had to pay for major car repairs and a new motor for our furnace recently, building our emergency fund is a task we're still working towards.

I also quit my part-time retail job. The reasons are many, but basically, by the time I drove to work and paid parking, those few hours weren't worth it. We really weren't making money. Plus, I wanted to be able to enjoy my family this Christmas season. I didn't get to do that last year because of the crazy hours. Add to all that, I'm hoping to either work from home doing customer service OR start a program to get my Master's in Education (for free, no lie) and start teaching.

So, suffice it to say, we've been tightening our belts. And really paying attention to what we spend and what we spend our money on. (Ack, I ended a sentence with a preposition... sorry about that.)

So, finally, these are a few things the recession is teaching me.

* Use leftovers. I know, it's sounds crazy. But for a really long time, we didn't really eat leftovers. We wasted them. When you think about it, how stupid is that? Wasting food = wasting money.

* My kids only need so many clothes. And toys. Really, I can go overboard buying clothes for my girls. Working in a kids' retail store made me "fall off the wagon" because before I went to work there, I did a LOT of consignment shopping. When I was working, I quit doing that as much. But I'm back on the wagon. I'd LOVE to go back to Columbus to these really awesome consignment stores my aunt took me to a few years ago. She (and those stores) got me into consignment shopping in the first place. It was the first time my daughter ever had clothes from Gymboree and Gap.

* The beauty of cheaper stores. Take Aldi, for example. I had shopped there intermittently, but never regularly. I can consistently get bananas there for $0.39 a pound. At my regular grocery store, they are usually $0.59 a pound, $0.49 on sale. Considering how often I bananas, that's a great deal!

* Wants vs. Needs. If I stop and think about it, I don't NEED most things on store shelves. There is a REAL difference when you consider Wants vs. Needs. I could never thank Dave Ramsey enough for that lesson.

* It's ok to ask for things you need as gifts. I feel like a bit of an idiot to admit that I just got this. Yes, for Abbie's 1st birthday, my parents got her a pair of shoes. Shoes for Abbie are, indeed, a big deal, what with her needing wide sizes and a different size for each foot. But you know what else she and her sister need? A new table & chairs. The one I bought them a few years ago has essentially bitten the dust. Both chairs are broken and a hazard. They need/I want shelves for their toys. And I just realized that it's ok to tell grandparents, aunts and uncles that. It's ok if they don't get 10 baby dolls this year. They are bombarded with "stuff" year after year but no one has thought where all that stuff will go, except Hubby and me because WE are the ones who have to deal with all the stuff everyday.

When did we start to believe that everything we give or get as gifts has to be fun?

Granted, it IS more fun that way, but you know what's not fun? Having 10 dolls and nowhere to put them.

I remember watching "Little House on the Prairie" when the girls each got a silver cup, a peppermint stick, a pair of red handmade mittens and a sugar cookie. These treasures made Laura exclaim that it was the best Christmas ever.

When did Christmas get so... big and focus on... more?

We've lost focus of the REAL reason we celebrate Christmas. If there is a silver lining to people not having as much money, it's that it forces us to stop focusing on material things and focus on what matters most: our family and friends. It makes us be creative. It makes us take stock of what we have and gives us pause when we think of what we really need compared to what we want.

Getting into the Spirit of Christmas, again

I've really been seeking God's help in trying to get into the Spirit of Christmas. I really wanted to recapture the excitement and enthusiasm I had had. I wanted to really focus on what is important.

Maybe I'm not the only one who felt like too much was being focused on things that really don't have anything to do with the Real Meaning of Christmas, like "Holiday Sales" and what not. Whatever the reason was the prompted our pastor to do a series on Christmas, I'm glad he's doing it because it's really helping, like rain for a desert.

This helped, too:
















Yes, these photos were taken at night because of a combination of me not being able to find the camera (big surprise, right?) and having to work. Still, snow is magical, don't you think?




















This photo doesn't really do the wreath justice. I love this wreath! I loved the red version of it, too. Maybe we'll use red next year?















There's just something about snow that helps me get "into" Christmas. While I realize that it wasn't snowing in Bethlehem when Jesus was born, it is often cold or snowy during the time of year we celebrate Jesus' birth where I live.

While not historically accurate for the event we're celebrating, it is tradition. At least, it is for me. But even if there is no snow, I can't let not-so-important details or factors hinder me from celebrating because the reason is so much more than the details. It's easy for so many of us to not be able to see the forest for the trees.

In addition to the incredible sermons our pastor is preaching, a couple of other things are reminding me why I should let go of what I can't control or what I'd like to do but don't have the time or resources to do and why I need to focus on the scene depicted in my very own front yard, of the nativity, of the Real Gift.

Where I work, we are raising money to send to St. Jude's. We were really close to our goal, within just a few hundred dollars, on Saturday. I was checking out a couple who was buying for their own children and others and when I asked them, they donated $100. $100!!!! It made my day. I think it made everyone's day. My co-workers and I were just so happy. It was awesome! That is what it's all about. Reaching out and helping those in need.

On my way home that night, Delilah was on the radio and she was talking about how easy it is to get wrapped up in all the details of Christmas and missing out on what's important. It's not about the gifts, the sales, anything else but, as she said (I'm paraphrasing... so wishing I could link to the audio of it), it's about the most humble gift the world has ever received, a baby, just a little baby wrapped in strips of cloth sent to save us and to give us eternal life.

God is answering my prayers and is sending me messages to help me refocus on the eternal, not just the urgent or important. There's a difference and it's so easy for the urgent and important to stand in the way of the eternal.

I hope everyone is enjoying the holiday season. Whether or not you're putting up a tree, baking cookies, sending cards or just simply enjoying the company of those you love, whatever you're doing, I hope you're making wonderful memories and are able to rest and be thankful for that wonderful little baby and the eternal changes He brought with His birth.

Feeling too Scroogey, too Bah! Humbug-ey.

A few weeks ago, was it two?, I felt really into the Christmas spirit. I had thought of perhaps putting up our Christmas tree before Thanksgiving, but didn't because it was "too early."

Then I got busy. We had Hannah's birthday party. I've been working. And somewhere in the mix of it all, I lost it. I lost the excitement of the season I blogged about it here and here. And I really want that excitement back!

Dear God,

Please help me be excited about this season again. Please help me to re-realize the excitement I had about celebrating the birth of Your Son, Jesus, the greatest gift you could ever give us. Please help me to once again feel the awesome wonder, if even just the tiniest bit, that was felt that incredible night that Jesus stepped into our world by becoming a helpless baby boy, who grew up and felt what all humans feel and took part in the human experience so you could save us.

Please help me to ignore the stupid materialism that has overtaken this holy season. Help me to overlook cranky, rude people. Help me to let go of all the things I wanted to do and enjoy what I'm able to do.

Help me to feel and experience the joy that only you can give so I can teach my daughters by example, by leading them. I know that their foundation and earliest memories are being built now, so I ask you to help me help them realize why we are celebrating.

Thank you.

Love,

Aimee

Excited About The Season

Tonight, I decided to do a couple of things for Thanksgiving and Christmas, but right now, I'd rather not talk about them. Really, I'm not sure if I will because I don't really believe that if we do good things we should broadcast it.

I'm not doing that. All I wanted to do is say, I'm so excited!

I think part of my excitement has been spurred by The Mother Project. It's a great idea and a great project. Check it out!

One of my most favorite Christmases was about 4 years ago (if I'm remembering correctly). My grandmother was at her hair stylist, and she told Ma-maw about a little grandmother trying to raise her grandsons on her own. She didn't have any money to buy them gifts for Christmas and was selling some of her own meager possessions to try to make a little extra.

Well, Ma-maw talked to Mom about it, and Mom talked with me. We decided to adopt the entire family for Christmas. Oh my goodness! It was so much fun to buy things for those boys, and get the groceries for Christmas dinner and beyond and even something for the little grandmother. It was so exciting. I can't even put it into words!

Really, honestly and truly, please hear my heart: I'm not out here trying to say, "Hey, look what we did." I'm saying, giving to others warms your heart. It connects you to people you might not otherwise know. For a long time, I wanted to do something like that. Where I grew up, there aren't a lot of agencies like the Salvation Army to provide the program in which to give to people.... but I found, I didn't need a group to provide the opportunity. If we open our eyes and look around us, someone, somewhere needs help. It might be the lonely neighbor, the frazzled mom, anyone.

Does anyone out there have any good ideas about how to celebrate Christmas in a different way, other than materialism? There's a book called "Unplug the Christmas Machine" that I'd really like to get and read (if I have time!). In the meantime, I'm looking for ways to celebrate the Real Meaning of the season without the focus being on material goods or ourselves.... though, I realize, some programs need things, material items, for what they accomplish, like Toys for Tots and things like that.

Bring on all the good ideas! I'm really excited to try something new this year.